Waaaaay back in 2007 you might remember there was an experimental venture between two of the world’s most influential filmmakers, Quentin Tarantino and Robert Rodriguez.
The project was Grindhouse and it saw each director make a film in the style of the old exploitation flicks that frequented the low budget picture houses and drive ins, especially in the 1970s.
Grindhouse
Tarantino helmed Death Proof that had Kurt Russel play a maniacal stuntman and Rodriguez was in charge of Planet Terror with Rose McGowan sporting a machine gun leg. The two combined to present a double feature, which was usually how this kind of film was shown in the old grindhouse theatres back in the day. So, cinema goers were effectively getting two films for the price of one.
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Unfortunately, the general public didn’t get around this ‘deal’, despite the two huge names behind it. Most complaining about the three-hour running time, which is funny, considering how long movies are now on average.
The films were subsequently released separately, but what many film fans missed out on were the mock trailers. To make the double bill feel all the more authentic, other big genre directors of the time jumped on board to make grindhouse-style trailers to movies that didn’t exist. They would play in between Planet Terror and Death Proof. The likes of Rob Zombie and Edgar Wright lent their talents, as well as Eli Roth with his trailer for a slasher called Thanksgiving.
A few of these fake previews got such a reaction from fans, that they were then turned into full feature films. Most notably Machete (which was Robert Rodriguez’s baby) and its sequel Machete Kills.
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Roth’s Thanksgiving was rumoured to be next in line, with the filmmaker working away at a script. But it just never eventuated…
A Time To Give Thanks
Fast forward sixteen years, I thought I’d forgotten all about the Thanksgiving mock trailer when I started seeing previews for Eli Roth’s new movie. But the first thing I thought was ‘hasn’t this been done before?’
In 2022, a Black Friday sale turns into a bloodbath when crazed shoppers chasing a bargain stampede through the door of a RightMart Superstore. Several people die in gruesome (and amusing) ways.
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One year later, people who were involved in this incident start getting picked off by a dude dressed as an American pilgrim, ‘John Carver’. The town goes into a panic as authorities try to discern who is committing these brutal murders.
Bloody Hell
Eli Roth is known for his films where extreme violence is the star of the show. With a filmography that includes Hostel, Cabin Fever and The Green Inferno, I had high hopes that the gore would flow in Thanksgiving.
And good god does it flow.
Fortunately, it’s not in the mean-spirited way that you would see in Hostel. The way victims are knocked of here is bloody fun.
One woman is basted and cooked alive in a giant oven, just like a Thanksgiving turkey. Another is chopped in half when a car pins her against a dumpster, her entrails gloriously spurting everywhere. A dude’s head is tenderised by a meat hammer… I could go on.
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My absolute favourite kill though was when a girl is jumping on a trampoline and ol’ Mr. Carver opts to pierce the fabric right under her bare feet with a knife. The poor girl landing on the knife is cringey enough, but when she keeps bouncing again and again on the blade due to her momentum on the trampoline, it is both hilarious and horrific.
(TriStar Picture)
And that’s about all that Thanksgiving really has to offer.
Slashed To Boredom
The problem with making a movie out of a mock trailer, is that it ends up being just a movie full of moments. If you’ve seen the trailer, you’ve seen most of the best bits.
Thanksgiving follows the slasher formula to a tee, and this is to its detriment. Being a massive fan of the horror sub-genre, outside of the fun kills, it’s just another slasher film.
Even the mystery of trying to figure out who the killer is doesn’t feel all that clever. It’s not the most obvious suspect, but it’s not really a surprise in the end all the same.
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Once the cat is out of the bag in that respect, the killer then proceeds to stalk the final girl like any other number of these types of movie, while spouting all manner of excuses for their crimes. And I got bored.
What Did You Expect?
But let’s be real, Thanksgiving delivers on what it promised, even back with that original mock trailer: gratuitous violence. It never advertised itself to be anything more. So if you can switch your brain off and enjoy the splatter, you’ll have yourself a bloody good time.
Quest Daily Scores Thanksgiving:
6/10
Thanksgiving is in cinemas now
